The Other Side of Anger

The best revenge is sleeping happily.

You've heard me say that being angry is not a sin and it isn't. Revenge, however, can be. Yet, when you hurt, made angry by injustice or betrayal, revenge may seem like an answer. Here's what I have learned over the past few months. I have been angry. I have been hurt. Life dealt me a blow from the bottom of the deck and I was pissed. I wanted someone to feel what I felt, to know that this type of pain, humiliation, and betrayal sucked--and in a way, I didn't care how it happened. But, I did. I do.

     Why? Because I was also mad at me! I blamed myself for things like not recognizing the signs, for failing to take charge, for--here's the interesting part--not giving 'em a good whup-ass! There, I said it. Wanted to draw blood, I did. Not proud of it, but grateful to have gotten in touch with my dark side and beat it into submission. How? With love.

     Revenge is a bitter pill. It raises the bile level to toxic levels beyond understanding. It fuels anger and unleashes our dark side. You know who gets hurt? The person whose soul is tampered by the concoction of evil--hate and malevolence are not easy task masters. They require more than a pint of blood from your soul. They claim it all.

     Forgiveness, however, is a balm to the weary heart. So, too, is love. I can't begin to tell you that it is easier said than done, but oh what a joy when you finally realize that forgiveness is wide and deep enough to cover a multitude of sins, including my own. So, I took a dose--starting with myself. Then I remembered that God is love--I am love--and have started down a different road. The road to recovery.

     I still say that there's something about getting pissed off that helps us recognize the opportunities before us. Getting angry is part of the fork in the road. Do you seek revenge? Wanna get even? No? Instead you forgive. Understand that life is not fair. I always reminded my children of this. It rains on the just and unjust. I got a little wet. I had some sorrow. But, I have always asked one thing of God when times are tough. "Please don't let me be bitter." This week another friend taught me another prayer. When things get tough and you're asking God to help you understand, you throw additional weight to this request and ask God to "Turn Up The Volume." 

     So, God, maybe I haven't been listening to well. I'm adding new speakers to my arsenal of peace tools. Take the spiritual hand of love and give me a blast of renewed faith and understanding, wisdom and compassion, love and joy--in the midst of this storm. Okay? God always answers and now that the volume is turned up I know that forgiveness is my choice instead of revenge. And that it is, in a way, the best revenge. These days I sleep well. I have more energy because I'm sleeping happily knowing that I dodged a bullet. Ain't that a kick in the pant?

     Peace.